Staying Calm

Hello Lovelies,



Sorry for the lack of postings lately, I know that that seems to be a common apology lately, and I am trying to be better about that.  But, the good news is that I'm here now!  So, how is everyone this lovely evening?  I hope that you've had a good day, and if you haven't, please allow this to be a bright point of your day.  Today has been a bit of a weird day for me.  I've had my points where I am feeling great and happy, as well as the points where I am feeling angry, sad, and disappointed.  But, I am feeling pretty happy about now and I'd like to inspire any of you that may be feeling slightly angry, sad, or disappointed to know you can turn your day around.


So, I saw this post the other day on Facebook about how when you're going about your day, having a good day, and you interact with someone that threatens to ruin your day, if you allow it to ruin your day, you are giving them power over you.  If you take that part that threatens to ruin your day and let it go, it allows you to stay in control and maintain your own peace.  This is the approach I battled with today.  I'm in customer service, and sometimes customers will drive you crazy, anyone that's ever worked customer service can tell you that.  But, I chose to not let that customer get under my skin because they were going to be gone in two minutes, versus letting it affect my whole day.  I chose to let it go shortly after they left.  This is still a work in progress for me people.  By no means am I an expert at this!  I still had plenty of times when I wanted to hang onto that anger and frustration because they partially ruined my day, and well, that's not cool either.  But, I am trying.  A for effort, right?  I am trying.  That's what counts.  And I was happier for the majority of my day than I would have been if I let it get to me and bother me all day.  So, I'd encourage you, if you're having a rough day, to remember that you want to maintain your control and don't give it away to just anyone.

I know that some of you may be thinking that there's no way you could do this.  But I feel it's important to note that you can't do it, YET.  You can do it, you just have to work up to it.  So often, we see or read things that make it sound like we should be able to just flip a switch and *insert heavenly music* you're happier or less stressed or whatever it may be, it doesn't work that way.  You have to work for it, even if it's just one time that you work to not let your anger or frustration get the better of you, that's work, and you're doing something!  So good for you!  I know that it can be frustrating when you look at other people and feel like they have it so figured out and pulled together; let me assure you, it takes time!  I'm a beginner at this, just like you, maybe even more of a beginner than some of you!  But, as a wise quote I read recently said, the difference between a beginner and a master is that the master has failed more times than the beginner has ever tried.  So, allow yourself to try, allow yourself to fail, but don't allow yourself to give up!



I want you to know that I am right there with you when it comes to not being a pro at finding your peace when you're in the middle of a storm.  Hell, sometimes I can't even find my peace when I'm in the middle of a drizzle.  I have a very quick temper and a VERY strong defense mechanism.  As soon as I feel any sort of push back, my walls shoot up, and everything locks down.  Believe me, you've never seen someone lose their inner peace faster than me.  I'm like the Hulk, but without turning all green and huge.  So, I'm working on it.  I know that I have a tendency to overreact, and it's really hard not to, but I'm trying.  And honestly, at this point, that's what matters.  So, I'd encourage anyone out there that is looking to improve themselves to try doing just a little bit at a time, because it's the little bits that will end up making the most difference.



I can be a mess, absolutely, and I push people away, and I pull in the wrong people, but hey, everyone does that!  I believe in you, I believe you can do this!  The reason I know you can do this?  Because I'm doing it.  If I can find my place, and maintain that calm, when I want to be enraged, well, hey, that helps me at the end of the day.  Now, yes, sometimes I enjoy a good fit of anger and letting off steam(I'm not a monk people), but ultimately, I don't want to spend my day miserable because of one person being miserable at the start of my day.  So, I just look at it as, I know that I get mad and frustrated, but then I remember that people are doing the best they can from where they are(most people aren't intentionally trying to piss you off), and then I can calm down, because even though they may still be frustrating me, I also start to feel pity(because they're operating at a lower level than I'm used to).  So, I know it may not be the best mentality, but for now, it's what works.  I know people are doing the best they can with where they are, and I know that I'm included in that!  But, this is what I do to help myself stay me.



So, I encourage of you beautiful people to get out, make the most of life, be happy, know that you matter, and someone with a bad attitude or whatever, is not enough to get to you, because you're better than that!  You can do it :)  Anyway, that's all for me!  So, have a good evening, try to remember to remain calm, and hold the peace, even when it's tempting not to.



xoxo,
Kona